One Month Ago

All the love in the world. All the heartache in the world. All the prayers in the world. None of this can bring David back to me.

I am in disbelief. The days have passed and I don't know where they have gone. One month ago, I was driving to the mall with Carlos. It was raining, traffic was congested, and David's call could not have come at a better time. I was missing him then, and I didn't even know it until I heard his voice. He was feeling a little stressed about school, but was more interested in hearing about my job prospects and being the supportive brother that he always was. Looking back now, I can see that David was withdrawn, but he was so loving. We probably talked for 15 or 20 minutes. I told him how I had volunteered that morning and I was going to look for a dress for Jacob's wedding. He told me how he was taking the greyhound home for the wedding and I told him I thought he would prefer that over driving. We just had a normal conversation. He asked how Carlos was doing, like always, how was his job? David was happy for him to hear that it was going well.

We hung up because he said he needed to go to the gym. I told him to have a good time at the gym and he reminded me to call him more often. I told him I hadn't been calling as frequently because I knew he was busy and didn't want to burden him. I told him I loved him and he told me that he loved me.

I didn't know it then, but that's the last conversation I will ever have with my brother David.